Believe Me, Its Addictive!

In July 2007 my sister and I invested some money with an investment company in Dubai. It was a two year investment BACKED by the government of Dubai. At that time, that backing meant that you COULD NOT go wrong. A year later the world’s financial markets had completely collapsed, and all everyone was talking about was how much this or that person had lost. By June of this year, every time I saw my sister I would ask, “Do you think we’re getting our money back?” And she would answer, “I don’t know, let’s wait and see.”

And so August rolls around and we receive an e-mail saying that the money will be transferred back to us within two to three weeks. Again I ask my sister, “can they lie to us about something like that?” and again she answers, “I don’t know, let’s wait and see.” So I go to my father, “Baba, when a company loses your investment, do they tell you immediately, or do they spin the truth and then shock you?” and he answers, “it depends.” No one could really assuage my fears, or guarantee that the money would come back, and all I could do was wait. The truth is that it wasn’t the idea of losing the money that was driving me crazy, it was the fact that I didn’t know. Three weeks and one day into August I call my sister again, “have you heard anything?” She says she tried to call them but the woman in charge of the transfers was away on holiday. By the beginning of September both my sister and I were beginning to accept the fact that our money was ‘gone with the wind!’

One night in September my husband and I were driving back home, and I was telling him that the money I invested was probably all gone. He goes on to explain to me that until we actually get some correspondence confirming the loss of the investment, there was still a chance that we would recoup at least some of our money. On a whim I say, “If I get anything back I am thinking of giving out 10% to the poor, what do you think?” He replies, “I think that’s a great idea, and I would never stand in the way of you doing well (3amal 5air).” The next night, as I lay down in bed trying to sleep, a thousand thoughts running through my head, it occurs to me that I had discussed it with my husband, but I had not actually made that promise to give away 10%, and so I made a vow with God. I woke up the next morning and the first thing I saw was a message from my sister that all the money had been transferred, including the expected profits!

Now that I could stop worrying about the money, I started worrying about whom to give the 10% to. A charitable institution? One person? A few people? The very next night I received a completely unexpected SMS from someone dear to my heart but whom unfortunately I have very limited contact with. She asks me if I know of anyone who is giving out ‘zakat’ because she knows of two women who desperately need money. Of course I get overexcited, call her in the middle of the night and ask how much they need. It turns out to be a tiny bit less than my ‘10%’ and I have never been happier writing out a cheque.

And that was the start of my addiction. I know I know it’s only been a month, but my whole attitude towards giving has changed. When I go out now, I look for people I can give to, whereas in the past I would quickly peep into my wallet to check if I have change, and if not, oh well, next time. I am shocked as to how oblivious I was to the chances that God gave me, and I chose to throw down the drain because I DIDN’T HAVE CHANGE! I keep thinking of how God in his infinite wisdom, created all the circumstances that lead to those two women receiving the money, and I realize that it was never mine to begin with, Sub7an Allah.

I remember once, a few years ago, a friend telling me that she had loaned ALL her inheritance money to a friend in need.
“All of it?” I ask.
“All of it.”
“But what if you need it?”
“She needed it more than I did”
Incredulous, I ask “and has she paid you back?”
“No, and I don’t think she’ll be able to.”
In the back of my mind I am thinking, serves you right for giving away all your money, but not wanting to make my friend feel bad I say “in-sha-Allah fe meyzan 7asanatich.”
She replies “in-sha-Alla, but you know if I had to do it all over again, knowing that I would not get any money back, I would still have given it all to her.”

Honestly, at this point I thought that my friend was crazy or was on some kind of drug. How could she give away all her money? What kind of person does that? Little did I know. She understood the bigger picture, and I in was stuck in my tunnel vision of how the world should work. I didn’t understand. But now I do, I understand perfectly.


بِسۡمِ ٱللهِ ٱلرَّحۡمَـٰنِ ٱلرَّحِيمِ
In the name of Allah, the Beneficent, the Merciful

(وَٱلَّذِينَ فِىٓ أَمۡوَٲلِهِمۡ حَقٌّ۬ مَّعۡلُومٌ۬ (٢٤) لِّلسَّآٮِٕلِ وَٱلۡمَحۡرُومِ (٢٥

سُوۡرَةُ المعَارج

And those in whose wealth there is a recognized right, (24) For the beggar who asks, and for the unlucky who has lost his property and wealth, (and his means of living has been straitened); (25)

Al-Maarij